Husband interferes with wife’s friendship


Dear Amy: A while ago my wife got a cellphone call from “Martine,” a very high-strung woman whom she regarded as a friend.

The reception was so poor that she asked Martine if they could talk when she got home. Instead of agreeing, Martine exploded in hysterical anger, screaming that the 40-year friendship was over.

This extreme and illogical overreaction left my wife so depressed that I finally wrote to Martine on my own initiative, asking what kind of person she was who would treat a friend in such a shabby and insulting manner.

I added that I was writing without my wife’s knowledge or permission (which she wouldn’t have given), but seeing the effect of her rage on my wife, I regarded it as my business, as well as hers.

Martine flew into another tantrum, but instead of directing it at me she attacked my wife, who had nothing whatsoever to do with my writing the letter.

Martine seemed to be determined to hurt her for no reason, or maybe she was deflecting.

I say good riddance and my wife seems philosophical about the matter, but the so-called “friendship” — is clearly over.

Initially my wife was not happy with my choice to contact Martine, but now she seems more or less behind it.

We agreed to ask for your views on my choice. Your thoughts?

— Protective Husband

Dear Protective: Your wife seems to have accepted your choice, as well as the consequences that have flowed from it, so asking for my opinion after the fact really puts me in the position of being an armchair referee.

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